Or You Won't & You Won't

Happy Saturday Post!

You'll do the work
And reap the lesson
Or you won't & you won't
Perhaps I'm just guessing

I'll go through the fire
And celebrate getting through
Or I won't & I won't
And my growth won't prove

You'll walk the walk
And earn the respect
Or you won't & you won't
Poignantly reflect

I'll push myself
And lose or gain "it"
Or I won't & I won't
No point in complaining

This year (for me) is about saying less, but letting my actions speak more. I don't want the #socmed accolades. I want the glory of 2016 to be stronger relationships (old and new) and personal moments that make me glow inside.

With words, song & prayer,
Tiffany V

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany V.

Consider the Dragonfly

Happy New Year! 

In lieu of a Saturday Post, here is a New Years promise, kept and keeping.

You rarely hear dragonflies 

Coming or going

Resting or moving

Not unless they are very close

Intimately close

Their song

Scary as the portents of

a new year
a new choice
a new life

Amazing

And unapologetic

For being

Quiet OR beautiful

They don't talk mess about 

how bam is their glam

No need for marketing

They don't puff up

They just show up

fly

be beautiful 

As they are

Don't need a billboard

to label them

beautiful

Their wings

Don't need

a million

Social media fans

Don't need merch buying followers

to increase their value

or premium

make them relevant

make them stronger

Don't need to be anywhere

Because they are

In front

On the sides

Behind

Beneath

Holding it up

Holding it down

Loud as the truth is scary

With barely any sound at all

They are free

to be heard

or ignored

Have you ever?

Let's do the dang thing. It's 2016.​

With the Old and the New

Goodbye 2015, here is a post to consider on the way out!


This 1

Blackbird
Bluest Eye
Bone straight hair
Skinny thigh
This is not I
This is part I
This in part I
This impart I
Winged creature fly
Dragon
Fly
Dragonfly
This is I
This is why

One of the good parts of 2015 - one of the lessons...

 ***

 This 2

This is the time

To sit, to sip

To look, to listen

This is the space

For pondering, for dancing

For writing, for singing

This is the joy

Loving, giving

Hoping, living

This is the work

The owning, the learning

The changing, the earning

Thank you for the trip 2015!

***

With words, song & prayer
Tiffany V

Death & I Are Feuding

Merry Christmas y'all, here's a Saturday Post!


I have to find my way
With fear and trembling
It's hard to walk in the light
There's so much shadow and shade
In the valley of the shadow

Death and I are feuding
It came for me
Tried to shame my body
My life
My home
My love

I have to find my way
Looking to the Light
It's hard to walk in this way
Slivers and scales on my eyes
In the valley of the shadow

Death and I are feuding
It came for me
Tried to take my children
My dreams
My hope
My heart

This is not the desert

This is just the dark

It's hard to look for light

The hands that guide can't find me

Death and I are feuding

Here in a healing heart

But I keep on fighting

For life

For legacy

For glory

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

Thank Rafiki

Hey y'all! Happy Saturday! Here's a post for ya.

How this...

© November 2015 - Thanks Rafiki

turned into this...

© November 2015 - That Turkey is Smokin'

tells me that God is real, and that the Lion King Turkey Blessing works!

Seriously, I thank you all for the amazing support and love throughout the year.

2015 has been a year of reaping. 

Some things bloomed beautiful,

some things passed on,

and many things went

into a new phase.

A word of caution,

and a promise

none of us gets out of this alive

So enjoy the turkey

and run this race to win

With words, song & prayer
Tiffany V

Body Fiction 3

Happy Saturday Post - I'm thankful for the life I've been given, and the stories I've been asked to post between now and the end of the year. Stay tuned! 

Meanwhile...

***

Six Separate Thoughts - Part III

My scars are my best friend and painfully we show

He waits- a gentleman with outstretched hand

On display broken, seething bloody glow

My pride is a garment of sifting sand

He stands to the side while I flail about

For the storm to peter out

He laughs at my rage when I move as if solo

The lines within which I am free court cliffs

His correction abrupt when I push past where to go

Under my shoulder he helps my missteps

We argue over ownership
Kingdoms via bodies and lips

It's lonely in the space of justified anger
How dare he prove and show my lack
In this way emotions can not linger
I was untethered 'til he pulled me back

His loving acceptance a lighthouse at sea
Returning home, not yet free

He massages my foot like he's invoking a shaman's spell
As if my deformation is his most prized possession
His thumbs are the lovers of my arches, ankles, heels
The somehow lost wholeness he calls to attention

And I can march to the tune of his love
My limp is a hitch kick on hold

He asks me to waltz knowing I won't really do well
As if my lacking dancer is somehow in session
He takes my wrists- holding smoke and steel
Touch whispers fly while my soul screams broken

From here to heaven I don't dare fly
His caress dreams that I try

***

For Seddy Bear - with three more to go before the end of November.

With words, song & prayer,
Tiffany Vakilian

© 2015 Highlight Video Productions

Black Poetry Day

On both my little bro's birthday AND Black Poetry Day, here's a Saturday Post!
 
From October-13
My family is an amazing maze of triumphs and failures
Heroic acts and artistic neuroses
I love them
More and more
The more I love
The bigger the family gets
There are some
Still lost
In the wilderness
I want them to know
There is a home hearth
Waiting
In my heart
In my house
No judgments
No past
Just now
Just a big hug
And a
Let's move on
From here
To the legacy

For those of you I haven't met yet, this image is my brother.
He will fly across the country to defend OR correct me,
and after the carnage, he will take me for coffee.
And be sure, he isn't even my fiercest protector... You've been warned.

Criticism

can be

Constructive

Growth can

Often

does

hurt

Petty prides

Cut with malice

Seeking destructive details

Why?

Because

Hurt people hurt people

Proud people

Sad people

Lonely people

Controlling people

Confused people

Normal people

Human people

That's why

Let's go viral

Growing up

Getting up

Pulling up

Pushing up

Why?

Why not?

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

Springs of Joy

Just because it's hot
Just because it's not
Just because I'm here
I'll share springs of joy
Not because my stores are full
Not because my hopes are empty
Not because it's Wednesday
I'll share springs of joy
Autumn and Summer duke it out
Winter and Spring watch for their turn
The holidays come and go like candy
And I'll share springs of joy
Just because I'm here
Just because you're here too
Just because it's there
I'll share springs of joy

With words, song & prayer
TiMo

It makes me smile...

Choosing

On Bonnie and Dan's Wedding Day - Here's a Saturday Post!

For Boba and Darth

I choose to nerd out

Get the word out

And I am not ashamed

I will sing and cry with joy

No plots or ploys

Only love to blame

I choose my friends who love me

Who envelope me

In their gracious arms

And while we sing the Star Wars main theme

She marries the man of her dreams

Right there on the front lawn

Love you, Bonnie - Congratulations!

You found the droid you were looking for!

In transit

From Ugly Drawers, Pretty Panties

On your mark, get set, GO
Where though
A pioneer through life's paths
A journey from here to eternity
A wanderer through the wonder of the simplest moments
I am in transit
I am not easily surprised, but life has a way of shutting me up
The more I learn, the more I see,the more I wish for simple songs and writing
The less I want to talk, the more I want to ask
What do you want to learn from your life?
What do you want to teach through your experiences?
What do you want your legacy to be?
Let's transit together and share the load
Let's converse about our wonder-wanders
And save each other time and trial
Learning to lean, learning to bow, learning to pray
As we travel from death to life
Let's enjoy the story
Show me your battle scars and I'll show you mine
From the past, when we were stupid
Yes, even five seconds ago
I am tired of my ears being tickled
We are moving from ignorance to wisdom
Through trial and text and a multitude of counsel
I want to go hard after life and excellence
So that when I am old my age will speak wisdom
I will tell my younger ones from experiences
And so I go, and I will bring stories in transit

Inspired by the phrase II
From Ugly Drawers, Pretty Panties

"Danger is very real, but fear is a choice." - Will Smith, After Earth
I will say it
I will give no quarter to the lie
The bind
The one that says I must say less
Give less
Be less
Because it scares you
(and by the way, if you ain't "you", then don't take ownership)
I will give it
I will open my heart to the sunshine
The freedom
The joy
Even in a moment
(and by the way, if you've been there with me, cool)
I will feel it
I will wear the full armor
Not apologizing
Not compromising
Accepting everything that I am to you, with you, for you
(All the many "you's" out there)
I will choose
Choose life
Choose me
Choose faith in the promise
I will be the fearless one I once tried not to be because of you
(Though I thank you for the trip)
I will change
I am a shifting rhythm
In the poem of life
In the life of a poem
And I am not written by you
(Though I have been edited by "you" from time to time)

Choosing

On the off chance that you can change for the better

Choose to

On the off chance you can get the spirit and not the letter

Choose to

I sometimes have difficulty

Letting pain back in to hurt me

Forgiving is a daily duty

But I choose to

This one is not finished...

With words, song & prayer
TiMo V

Theme & Variations from UDPPBook

Poetry in the morning. How sweet it is.

© 2015 Tiffany Vakilian

Thinking about my Goddard peeps and the poetry that they inspired in me.

I've heard it said

A great many things about

Dynamic duos

Complimentary opposites

The dance and not the battle

Heard that last week

In and out

Red and blue

Blue and grey

Yin and yang

Yanantin and masintin

Partners in a samba

Can they dance alone?

Can I?

On the dance floor called corpus callosum

The moonlight and shadow

One orb

The storyteller and the administrative assistant

Breathing

Both directions are necessary

For life

Body

Hands feet

Left side right side

Seen unseen

Wolf wife

That’s for Clarissa

Who started this whole conversation

Without even knowing I existed

Or perhaps

It was Tannen

She said it is communication

That can destruct meaning

Goffman's impressions

Given and given off

Gilligan’s pleasure

Relationship for relationships

And all the stories in between

And around

And throughout

Can they dance alone?

Can I?

Thanks Anne

For your friend Kitty

Imaginary and real

Realized

Shange's choreo-poem

Embodiment?

The dance of communication

Or beauty

Or therapy

A mushroom, Alice

Eat it

One side makes you bigger

And the other...

Otherizing

Let's bring in Pme and Qme

Honne and Tatamae

There I am

In the conversation

Of duality

Recognizing and engaging

Via dual-expression

Write it

Then say it

No

Say it

THEN write it

One feeds the other better in this way

This way that way

Light shadow

Felt sense felt senses

Hearing with ears

Our words

Our woman-self words

Can they dance alone?

Can I?

Front self Pme

Meta-self Qme

Winding a winding road

To knowing

To gnowing

Knowing and gnowing

Oracle and Architect

Archetypes

Popular culture

Myth story

Can they dance alone?

Can I?

With words, song & prayer,

TiMo

The Great Duality

Happy Saturday to you! Here's your Saturday Post!

I dreamt this week that I was surrounded by deep water, but my living situation was a high hill with many buildings (think Minas Tirith in the Pacific). My view was sometimes from under the water, and sometimes from a middle place looking down. Family and certain friends were there, and I was teaching. I'm not yet at an age when grandchildren run about my legs, but I feel like it is always going to come down to that balance of duality; not undecided, but with singularity of purpose.

This fountain in me seems full
Grace
Truth
Christian
Pharisee
Family
Business
Pme
Qme

This journey is me feels forked
Heaven
Hell
Acceptance
Rejection
Paul
Peter
Joy
Dejection

I seek purification within and without
Heart
Life
Maturity
Childishness
Wings
Weights
Love
Indifference

I run this race to win
Get up
Go on
Learn
Unlearn
Build up
Take down
Win
Burn

The natural tendency is to choose one side
But I have
Can't you see
Hidden
In plain sight
Complicated
Simplicity
My shadows
Prove a light

When I lived on the East Coast, I told my older brother I was vacillating between staying and moving back to CA. He told me, "once you make the decision you'll have peace". It took about a year before I moved back, but from the point of choice, both options worked toward my goal. I was so scared for so long that people would beat me down for saying out loud the things I say, as if it were about me. I've been told this week, "Do you have any idea how strong you are; and how intimidating that is?" Would it were not so.

I'm human; cuts hurt. I am a phoenix too; only in Christ. I've been given a "talent", and I am duty-bound NOT to bury it, but to make it bear fruit. I was told by a pastor in Virginia, "you have kingdoms in you..." and that is one of the things that have driven me to write poetry, stories, emails, blog posts, dreams... It makes room, like an overfull vessel being emptied (and the relief is sublime).

It is not about me, no matter how I benefit.

With words, song and prayer
TiMo V

Go After that Thing

For the singers battling their own voices - here is a Saturday Post!

Go hard after it

Whatever it is

That one thing

Learn that lesson

Lose that weight

That one thing

For me
It has always been
To freely sing
But I am learning how
And I will now
Do that one thing

Sometimes too big
Out of control
A cannon ring
Sometimes weak
Cracked and raw
Songs in a sling

I've given it up
I've gotten it back
It's a trick on string
I scream notes
I cry music
Give it wings

I go hard
To learn and be
God-help-me-ing
My voice is mine
I'll die for it
My life to bring

My poetry - my alter
I leave it here
I'm promising
To use my voice
No matter the cost
For truth-telling

Go hard after it

Whatever it is

That one thing

Follow that dreamscape

Or escape the dream

Do that one thing

With words, song & prayer,

TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

Brave Enough to Share

Workin' that work and sharing my Saturday Post! Enjoy!

My friend told me today that she and her husband sat together and read one of my poems. She said they cried together in the reading. I told her I just wanted to tell the truth. That's why I write.

They even made a comment about My Violin of an Armpit. I am going to read it this evening.

I was interviewed by A Word With You Press for the Author Spotlight and I'd like to share that with you today.

My book launch party is in a few hours, and I'm so busy getting ready for it, I can't even be nervous about it. But those feelings will come. And I may write about them. Sometimes it hurts to tell what I'm seeing, doing, learning, or becoming. But that is the work. And I am humbled by the people who are brave enough to share their words with me. They inspire me to do more. So thank you all (song writers, poets, rappers, friends, etc.) for giving me the strength to tell my own story.

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

AWWYP Author Spotlight- Tiffany Vakilian!!!

As part of our ongoing series interviewing writers , authors and poets in the AWwYP stable, we’d like to highlight Tiffany Vakilian. Read on about her practice of writing (and singing) and about what grounds finding your voice.

You can read my interview HERE

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

At the Bottom

For your consideration - a Saturday post.

 © 2014 Tiffany Monique

She saw a heart there
At the bottom of the cup
But as she drank deeper
It changed into a triangle
Surely then
She had to chase again

He saw it blue
At the bottom of the glass
But as he looked closer
It changed to a defect
Surely then
He had to chase again

Surely then
She had to chase again
Down there
To the bottom of the cup
Surely then
He had to chase again
There is no freedom
Yet it doesn't seem as such

She saw love
At the bottom of the glass
But as she fell deeper
It changed into a jail
Surely then
She had to run again

He saw himself
At the bottom of the cup
But as he searched harder
It changed into a lie
Surely then
He had to find again

Surely then
She had to chase again
Down there
To the bottom of the cup
Surely then
He had to chase again
There is no freedom
Yet it doesn't seem as such

This piece is not quite finished. I'd like to think they eventually leave the cup alone. But they haven't told me that part of the story yet.

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Tiffany Vakilian Joins BookDaily.com

Vista, CA August 18, 2015  BookDaily.com is pleased to announce that Tiffany Vakilian will be featured on the popular book sampling site – joining the ranks of the most famous authors in the world.

As a featured author, the first poems of Vakilian's books are now available to thousands of readers to sample – free of charge. At BookDaily, book fans can browse, search and read first chapters from a selection of more than 80,000 titles.

Vakilian is currently promoting Ugly Drawers, Pretty Panties a Black American book of Poetry published by A Word With You Press. Visit Vakilian’s website at www.tiffanyvakilian.com and their BookDaily page as well http://www.bookdaily.com/author/2389716/tiffany-vakilian.

Like many other authors, Vakilian is making use of the quick and easy tools BookDaily offers for writers to market their books.

Launched in May 2009, BookDaily has rapidly become the leading source of book samples by email. More than 10 million sample chapters have been distributed through BookDaily.com and through the site’s email subscriptions.  The site is a division of ArcaMax Publishing, the leader in consumer news and entertainment by email.

***   ***   ***

For information about A Word With You Press, please contact 760-500-5409. For media inquiries, please contact A Word With You Press at Thorn@AWordWithYouPress.com.

God in my bed with me

Hello to you! Here is your Saturday Post!

It was the tiny toddler time of morning
I lay there in bed
Not afraid
Peace has stayed
Because God is in my bed with me

I was fidgeting while healing through pain
I lay there in bed
Not quite healed
But my wounds are sealed
And God is in my bed with me

Sleep and I are awkwardly not dating
It's an on and off relationship
I'm not all that worried
And I'm in no hurry
When God is in my bed with me

Contemplating the deeper shadows
They seems strange considerations
This world - in and not of
Cajoling forgiveness without push and shove
As God is in my bed with me

A few more hours until the sun
I lay there in bed
Not taking myself that seriously
Life is viewed more ludicrously
Because God is in my bed with me

Read a tiny story of my childhood here.

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Yours Truly, Summer 2011
© Tiffany Monique

A Royal Daughter

Had she been my own daughter, I couldn't be more proud of the woman she has become. I wish to honor her today.

I have
A good friend V
Standing strong
In the face of sorrow
And conflict
In the same
Situation
-I did not stand so
Bravely
She humbles me

She asked previously
For advice
About her situation
And after referring up
I told her
The best advice I could
"Walk out your royalty"
She did
-In the same situation
Shaped for myself
I did not

Kudos to my friend
Of whom
I am most proud
She is a living epistle
A post-it note
For my soul
A beautiful heart
Showing love
In a
Somewhat
Or Seriously
Unloving situation
I bow.

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Forgiveness is an Amputation

Fanning away midsummer heat, here's your Saturday Post!

Forgiveness is an amputation

With phantom limbs

I've got some more cutting to do

I was told once and remind again

Try to be brave enough

To break your own heart

Embrace the pain and freedom

And never forget that

Pride and ego bind a wound

Habit is holding grudge

For that toxic tourniquet

One must make deep the cut

Forgiveness is an amputation

Sometimes with phantom pains

I've got some more cutting to do

But I am still running my race

The salty taste of things done in the dark cry out to be held forever, as if a tidal wave could protect a pearl. "It is a sin to lock yourself in a dark past when you hold such a light within you as your real self. Your free self."

With words, song & prayer, TiMo

Onward Looking

© Tiffany Monique February 2014

‪#‎UDPPbook‬ ‪#‎booklaunchparty‬ ‪#‎workthatwork‬ ‪#‎HVP‬ ‪#‎AWordWithYouPress‬
Book Launch Press Release - http://t.co/183kOoLHe2

Moving

Welcome back! Here's your Saturday post!

There has been a lot of heavy furniture moving

In my house of late

The same room becomes brand new

Using old things in new places

Redeeming time by redeeming space

Air flow

Light flow

House to home

There has been a lot of heavy furniture moving

Sore muscles speak

The pain of change

Appreciated exhaustion

Stubbed toes and bruises

And admissions

Of being weak

Broken

Valueless
There has been a lot of heavy furniture moving

Changing minds

Keeping paradigms

Live that may or may not matter

Lies turned into truths

Truths strengthened by facts

Dead things come to life

And living things begin to die

There has been a lot of heavy furniture moving

Lexicon evolutions

Old markers moved

Justice for more

Still not for all

Love cause political

Politics cause love

There has been a lot of furniture moving

~~~ ~~~ ~~~

I submitted another piece for the AWwYP "Again" writing contest. Please read it and comment! I wrote my submission from the perspective of stream-of-consciousness breaking the fourth wall. I did it to be corny, shocking, and to let me hubby know I was thinking about him, but according to the responses I received, I was a bit more honest than I meant to be about what I feel about making the money vs. making the art. Sometimes the facade holds, but "truth melts magic, always." 

With words, song & prayer,
TiMo

Onward Looking

© Tiffany Monique February 2014